Prefer listening? I have added a short audio version of this week’s newsletter:
You’re tired. You’ve been tired all day.
But the moment you get into bed, your brain wakes up.
Suddenly you are:
- replaying messages
- planning tomorrow
- scrolling “just for a minute”
And before you know it, it’s 1am.
If you live with ADHD, this isn’t unusual.
It’s one of the most common and frustrating patterns.
Case Study: AA
AA is 29, works full-time, and was diagnosed with ADHD two years ago.
She wakes up tired most mornings, despite going to bed at a “reasonable” time.
Her evenings usually look like this:
She plans to sleep at 10:30pm.
But after getting into bed:
- she scrolls on her phone
- watches a few videos
- starts thinking about things she didn’t finish
Her mind feels busy even when her body is exhausted.
By the time she tries to sleep, it feels like her brain is “on.”
She often doesn’t fall asleep until 2am.
The next day:
- she struggles to wake up
- feels foggy
- relies on caffeine
- repeats the cycle
What’s really happening?
This isn’t just “a bad habit.”
ADHD affects:
- arousal regulation: your brain doesn’t power down easily
- dopamine levels: night-time can feel more stimulating
- transitions: switching from “on” to “off” is difficult
So even when you’re tired, your brain isn’t ready to sleep.
The 4-Step Approach I Use with Patients
1. Identify the real barrier:
The barrier could be:
- mental overstimulation (scrolling, thinking, planning)
- difficulty transitioning
- racing thoughts
- revenge bedtime procrastination
This step is important because once the barrier is identified, the clarity will lead to solutions.
AA’s brain is overstimulated at night
- she’s using her phone for dopamine
- her thoughts are not externalised
2. Create external structure:
ADHD brains struggle most at night because:
- energy is low
- decision-making is worse
- discipline drops
Because of these, it best not to rely on willpower and have external structure in place such as fixed “wind-down” sequence (not strict bedtime) and alarms for starting wind-down (not just sleep time)
ADHD brains are driven by interest, urgency, and reward.
Sleep often loses that battle because scrolling or watching something feels more stimulating and rewarding in the moment.
So instead of relying on willpower, AA needs to work with her brain and make her wind-down routine more enjoyable (podcasts, music, familiar shows)
Add gentle structure or urgency such as setting a timer to start winding down.
AA’s suggested routine
- 10:00pm: shower
- 10:15pm: tea and podcast
- phone stays off bed
3. Start before you feel ready:
Start slowing down before you feel tired enough to sleep
Because if you wait until you’re exhausted, you are more likely to scroll and your brain is still active
For AA, it is important to commit to her goal and start her wind-down routine even for 5 minutes so motivation can kick in.
4. Reward progress, not perfection
People with ADHD often:
- judge themselves for “bad nights”
- try to fix everything at once
- give up when it’s not perfect
For AA: Sleeping at midnight instead of 2am is progress and should be celebrated. Same as reduced scrolling time and following part of the routine.
If you have ADHD, sleep isn’t just about discipline.
It’s about how your brain transitions, regulates, and winds down.
The goal isn’t a perfect routine.
It’s a repeatable, realistic system that helps your brain slow down.
Why not start small today, reduce stimulation around bedtime and get thoughts out of your head.
Got a situation you’re struggling with?
Send it my way, I may break it down in a future edition.
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